People
by broadwaybaby4205
Summary: COMPLETE! Twoshot. Serenacentric. Pre-show. "Blair was always poised and proper, even when Serena could tell that she was at her breaking point." Pairings: BlairSerena FRIENDSHIP, mentions of SerenaNate, ChuckBlair, and NateBlair.
1. Part One

**Author's Note: Well, this is a BlairSerena friendship fic, centered around Serena. I hope you guys like it! This takes place during the last month of their freshman year and centers around Blair's bulimia. There will be two chapters total. Read and review please! **

**Disclaimer: Vanessa/Chuck would not have happened if I owned "Gossip Girl".**

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_Sometimes people put up walls not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down._

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Serena Van Der Woodsen strutted back to her table at Match 65 as she exited the women's restroom.

It was a sunny day in the middle of May, and the two girls were eating lunch at Blair's favorite sushi bar before heading out for a shopping spree. They were heading to the Hamptons with Blair's parents, the Archibalds, and Chuck Bass in less than a month and they needed to fill their summer wardrobes.

She smirked at the guy at the corner table as she headed to her seat. He had been eyeing her with his gorgeous emerald eyes since she and Blair walked in. As she looked over his tan form, she couldn't escape the voice in the back of her head that reminded her he was no Nate Archibald.

Eventually, she approached her and Blair's table and took a seat across from her friend.

"Did you order yet, B?" Serena questioned, sliding into her seat.

"No, I've been trying to get the waiter's attention for the past ten minutes. Incompetent much?" Blair scoffed.

In an attempt to avoid a rant from Blair, Serena made eye contact with the waiter and motioned for him to walk toward their table.

"Ugh, finally," Blair grumbled.

"Can I take your order?" the waiter inquired as he slid up to the table, looking at Serena.

"I'll have the rainbow rolls please," Serena ordered.

"And for you, miss?" the waiter asked Blair.

"I'll have the spicy tuna rolls, the eel and avocado rolls, and the dragon rolls," Blair listed.

"One moment, ladies," he replied, taking their menus before walking away, his eyes on Serena's figure.

"Wow, hungry?" Serena grinned, taking a sip from her Coke.

"Yeah, I skipped lunch," Blair replied, smirk fixed perfectly in place as she took a sip from her iced tea.

"Oh," Serena replied, "Didn't your mom get home from Milan last night?"

"Yeah," Blair replied, looking down for about a second.

For that moment, a look of what almost seemed like sadness crossed her elegant features, but seconds later she looked up at Serena, her ruby lips twisted upward once more.

Sometimes, Serena just wished Blair would let her in. They had been best friends and Serena told Blair everything; however, it seemed that Blair told Serena almost everything. They were practically linked at the hip, but it was a very rare occasion that Blair would let her guard down. She was always poised and proper, even when Serena could tell that she was at her breaking point.

Honestly, sometimes she just wanted to shake Blair sometimes and let her know she could talk to her.

"How are things with Nate?" Serena cheerfully probed, although she couldn't escape the twinge of pain that ran through her chest.

God, Nate…she really wished she could get him out of her head. But as much as she repeated that "He's my best friend's boyfriend" mantra repeatedly in her head, she couldn't escape the feeling she got in the pit of her stomach when she was around him.

She felt lightheaded, dizzy, and completely sick. But somehow, she just kept craving more of it.

"Great," Blair answered, "He came over last night and watched _My Fair Lady_. He brought over these delicious pastries from the bakery on 74th and Lex."

"That sounds so fun, B," she responded enthusiastically, although her mind was somewhere else entirely.

She felt sick whenever she heard Blair gush about her perfect relationship with Nate. She wanted to be the girl Nate cuddled and watched movies with, the one he bought ruby studded rings for, the one kissed gently on the lips before heading to lacrosse practice. And Serena hated that she would never be that girl. He and Blair would be the perfect couple while she sat on the sidelines.

However, worse than that, Serena felt immensely guilty. She tried to get Nate out of her head, distracting herself with other guys included. But whenever she was with them, as thrilling as it may be, she couldn't escape the voice in the back of her head reminding her that it wasn't Nate. And it never would be.

"Yeah, it was great," she agreed, looking blissful.

Thankfully for Serena, the waiter appeared before she had to hear anymore about Blair and Nate's perfect night.

"Here's your order," he smiled, placing their food down in front of them, throwing Serena a wink.

She smiled politely in return before turning her attention back to Blair, who was already devouring her spicy tuna rolls.

Serena started to tell her to slow down, but stopped herself. She eyed Blair suspiciously as she ate. There was something off and Serena couldn't quite figure out what. Blair was going down each row of rolls, in order of type, inhaling her sushi as rapidly as one possibly could using chopsticks.

"So, where do you suggest we shop next?" Blair asked in between bites.

"I'm thinking Barney's," Serena suggested cheerfully, "I found this dress there that I must have."

"Sounds good. I vote Bendel's after that," Blair chimed in.

"Alright, we need to take Chuck and Nate shopping with us again. Last time was probably the best shopping trip ever," Serena giggled.

The previous week they had dragged Nate and Chuck shopping with them, and Nate was practically bored to tears. He spent the entire time complaining about when they could leave. Chuck, on the other hand, was surprisingly enthusiastic, giving them tips on what they should and shouldn't buy.

"We'll just make sure Nate brings a copy of _Sports Illustrated_ with him," Blair laughed.

Serena chuckled as she started in on her first sushi roll. She glanced over at Blair's plate, noticing she had already inhaled all of her food. Deciding not to comment on it, Serena chewed her food and eyed her friend suspiciously. She knew something was up, but she couldn't figure out what. And so, Serena ate her rainbow rolls in silence, racking her brain for all possible explanations to Blair's strange behavior.

Finally, finishing her food, Serena put down her chopsticks, taking a sip from her Coke.

"S, I'm going to call Nate to see if he needs me to come over later to help him study for the French test, and then find the ladies room," Blair declared, "You can get the bill when I'm gone so we can shop."

"Okay," Serena agreed.

As she waited for the waiter to appear, she couldn't help but wish she was Nate's smart girlfriend whom he loved, calling to ask if he needed homework help. She felt a wave of guilt and desire wash over her body as she toyed with the thought.

Thankfully, the waiter appeared, interrupting her thoughts.

"Here's your bill, miss," he stated, handing it to her, "I put my number on the back of the receipt. Give me a call."

He smirked devilishly in a way that reminded her of Chuck before sauntering off. Serena put in enough cash to cover both their meals, grabbing the receipt.

Maybe she would call him…he was no Nate…but still. Maybe it would distract her.

Serena rose to her feet and headed toward the restroom to tell Blair she had gotten the check. God, she just wished Blair would talk to her. She knew something was wrong and she just wanted to shake Blair and tell her to stop trying to act like she was putting on a show.

The quote "All the world's a stage and all the people in it merely players" was practically the story of Blair's life. With her, everything was a show, and it was a rare occasion that she stopped performing.

Serena swung open the bathroom door, stepping inside; however, she immediately stopped dead in her tracks.

**A/N: Well, that's part one! The second part will be up when I have the time to write it…heh. Read and review please! And ask kind as story alerts are, they do not let me know what you think of the story so please leave a review. It only takes like a minute of your time. Thanks! :)**


	2. Part Two

**Author's Note: Well, here's part two. Please review, people! I got a bunch of alerts, but only two reviews. Anyway, enjoy! **

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_People who need people are the luckiest people in the world._

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Serena heard gagging from one of the stalls. She allowed her eyes to fall to the floor where she saw a pair of royal blue Christian Louboutin pumps sticking out of the bathroom stall. She recognized those shoes. She and Blair had bought them last week at Bergdorf's during their infamous shopping trip with Chuck and Nate.

Serena stood there, frozen. She could hear her heart pounding in her chest as she stood there, unsure of what to do. She heard Blair flush the toilet, and an overwhelming panic washed over her body as she tried to think of what to do.

Finally, she settled for hiding in the bathroom stall and scampered in there as quickly as possible.

After a few moments, she heard Blair's phone ring, and listened as Blair picked it up.

"Hello, mother," Blair answered, "I'm out with Serena. I told you we were going shopping today. No, I didn't wear the Von Furstenburg…I thought you liked it on me. You said the color brought out my eyes…oh…well…okay…I guess I could take it back. I'll see you tonight. Yes, Serena and I ate. Sushi. I-I didn't eat too much…okay…bye."

Serena heard her phone click shut.

"Love you too, mom," Blair muttered.

God, she felt bad for Blair. She knew Eleanor and Blair weren't best friends or anything. But she didn't know Eleanor could be so…cruel. They always kept a cool exterior around Serena.

A few moments later, Serena could hear the sounds of buttons pounding into Blair's phone.

"H-Hi, Nate? It's Blair," Blair muttered.

Serena could very faintly tell that Blair was on the verge of tears. Never in their ten years of friendship had Serena ever seen Blair cry. As she stood, leaning against the bathroom stall of Match 65, Serena questioned if they even had a friendship. There was so much Blair didn't tell her.

"Oh…no reason. I just wanted to say hi…I miss you. Okay, well, have fun at lacrosse. I guess I'll talk to you later. I-I love you. Bye," Blair spoke.

Serena sure didn't see that coming. She thought Blair was Nate's top priority…it always seemed like that around Serena at least.

Once again, she heard the familiar pounding of keys into Blair's phone.

"H-Hi, Chuck?" Blair greeted, and tears were evident in her voice, "Can you talk or are you tending to your flavor of the week? Nothing…I-I'm just having a bad day. Everything's wrong...my mom, Nate, my parents are fighting. Could I come over tonight when I'm done hanging out with Serena? Dinner at Tavern on the Green sounds great. See you tonight."

Serena felt an overwhelming feeling of nausea settle into her stomach. Blair opened up to Chuck more than she did her? Was she really that bad of a friend? She had to talk to her.

Opening the bathroom stall, Serena stepped out to see Blair clutching her phone, silent tears rolling down her flushed cheeks.

"Serena? How long have you been in here?" Blair confronted, immediately wiping away her tears and putting her poker face back in place.

"Long enough," Serena answered.

The two girls stood there for a few minutes, just staring at one another, tears eventually flowing freely down Blair's face. Despite her obvious upset, she continued to keep her face completely calm and collected.

After a few moments, Serena wrapped her arms around friend, pulling her into an embrace.

"Why didn't you talk to me?" Serena questioned.

"I don't know," Blair mumbled.

"Blair, you're my best friend. When something's wrong, you can talk to me. I'll always be here," Serena promised.

"But your life is perfect. You wouldn't understand," Blair confronted.

"I think I understand more than Chuck," Serena responded.

"Believe it or not, Chuck gets it," Blair explained.

"And I don't?" Serena replied.

"No, you don't," Blair spat, "All the world loves the amazing Serena Van der Woodsen. You always get your way."

"That's not true, B. And even if it were, you could still talk to me," Serena pleaded.

"No, I couldn't," Blair insisted.

"Why not?" Serena pressed.

"Because. Then you'll know that my life isn't perfect," Blair reasoned.

Serena could never quite understand Blair's obsession with perfection. She always wanted everything to be flawless, and blocked out anything that wasn't.

"Blair, please. I'm begging you. If you don't tell me when something's wrong, then this isn't even a real friendship. I'm just your shopping buddy," Serena explained.

"No, you're not. You're my best friend," Blair insisted, a slight smile gracing her features.

"Then talk to me, please," Serena begged followed a by a long pause, "Blair, please. I won't judge. You just need to tell me when something's going on with you."

"Fine," Blair chuckled a bit, as Serena pulled her into a hug.

"Blair, bulimia? How long has this been going on?" Serena confronted.

"You heard that?" Blair inquired.

"Yes, I did," Serena confirmed, "Why would you do that to yourself?"

"I-I don't know," Blair responded vaguely.

"Blair, come on. You said you would talk to me," Serena pressed.

"It gives me a sense of…control," Blair supplied, tears forming ever so slightly in her chocolate colored eyes, "I feel like I'm in control of the situation and that feels good. Not my mother, not Nate, not karma, just me. I'm so sick of never being good enough, or thin enough, or pretty enough, and I don't know how to explain it…it just makes me feel better. Like I can be perfect."

Rather than responding, Serena just wrapped her arms around her friend

Serena Van Der Woodsen had been best friends with Blair Waldorf since their first day of kindergarten, but it was safe to say that that was the day their friendship truly began.

**A/N: Well, I hope you guys liked it! I know this chapter was completely cheesy and short. Review please! :)**


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